This post is for no one in particular, I just want to get some thoughts out of my head and what better place to do that than a public place such as a blog. I’m 18 I have completed college and I’m quite happy with my grades (A.B.C). This is a time in my life that things should be changing. Lots of friends are now in university, some are working, some are back doing another year of college and then there are a few like me that can’t find a job (a couple that won’t) and our not at Uni. One thing about myself some people may or not know is that I’m I can be OK doing stuff… but it’s when there is a wait before doing that thing, that is when it affects me. That time before you do something, now in that time everything that is bad that could in fact happen while I go out, will shift through my mind, I could be guilty of letting that worrying stop me from going out, there is times. Right now my whole life is in one of the waiting periods. I don’t even know IF I want to go to university, let alone what course I want to do. I have not had a full time job so I’m not sure what that is like, so I worry about that and I’m not sure when I will get one. so it is another thing i’m waiting for that to happen. I would have thought or I would had hope by now I would have had a girlfriend to. At this moment I’m doing the same things as I was a year ago, seeing the same old friends (who are great), wanting that same old girl (who might not be that great) but nothing is happening. You could say that I’m having a midlife crisis at 18! Only a joke but seriously I feel like I’m in a rut something needs to change quick! I have way too much time on my hands and if it was not for the fact that I can write (which gives me some purpose in my limbo) I may have gone a little mad (if not already). I want to take advantage of all this time I have because, I’m sure once I get a full time a job I’m sure i will be complaining about that. So all I can do is my writing and write is what I will do! I have been thinking about this too much laid in bed, looking at what other people are doing and being envious of them. Ahhhh whatever, it just piss me off. I have no direction just lots of dreams. I could put more but I know I will just go round in circles because that what I do in my mind.
Have to say that this song seems to fits my feeling a lot at the moment.
I have the Pulled apart by horses gig this Saturday so i am looking forward to that so Woo.